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I couldn't find any gramar rule that says "* and he" is incorrect.

However, I found out that "he and *" is more common/idiomatic.

Are constructions like "his wife and he" or "her friends and she" incorrect/uncommon? Why or why not?

Example sentence: "His wife and he went to Hawaii last week."

alexchenco
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There's no rule against it. It's much more common to say "he and his wife", "she and her friends", etc. But switching the order is perfectly correct.

https://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=he+and+his+wife%2Chis+wife+and+he&year_start=1800&year_end=2008&corpus=15&smoothing=3&share=&direct_url=t1%3B%2Che%20and%20his%20wife%3B%2Cc0%3B.t1%3B%2Chis%20wife%20and%20he%3B%2Cc0#t1%3B%2Che%20and%20his%20wife%3B%2Cc0%3B.t1%3B%2Chis%20wife%20and%20he%3B%2Cc0

In general I'd say to use the more conventional order. But if you have some reason to reverse it -- emphasis, parallel with another sentence, whatever -- it's perfectly fine.

Jay
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    You should know about false positives in Ngrams. It cannot be cited without checking that the instances actually include the phrase unadulterated. For example: … *And the miller awoke, and found* **not his wife ; and he went** *into the mill* … **2** … *he was unduly pessimistic about his relationship with **his wife, and he agrees** that this is certainly a pattern for him*… **3** … *the man who worked as foreman in the bicycle factory killed* ***his wife and he is now*** *in the courts* … **4** … *And the men of the place **asked him of his wife**; **and he said***, *She is my sister*:… – Mari-Lou A Jul 02 '20 at 17:37
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    @Mari-LouA Fair enough. Is it your position that "his wife and he" is wrong? Or just the the ngram is misleading? – Jay Jul 02 '20 at 19:37
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    I would say native speakers never use that order. It's confusing it sounds like a same sex marriage, nothing wrong with that but I had to read the statement twice before I realised the female spouse headed the phrase. – Mari-Lou A Jul 02 '20 at 19:37